Jimmy Cracks Wise, and We All Care

Jimmy Rollins appeared on the Best Damn Sports Show Period last week, and made some comments that have, to say the least, poked the hornet's nest of Philly sports with a big old tree branch.

"They're frontrunners. When you're doing good, they're on your side. When you're doing bad, they're completely against you." (You can watch the whole clip here as well as his follow-up comments following the Phuror.)

It's much too easy to make this a black-and-white issue, either by saying Jimmy's exactly right, or by allowing yourself to be angry and outraged. There's a whole lot going on here, and it's certainly much more gray than you think.

On the one hand, my initial reaction was more in line with the second option listed above, something to the effect of: "Frontrunners?!? Doesn't that require consistently winning teams? Didn't you read my entry from a couple of weeks ago?

You wanna hear the end of the boos, Jimmy? Why don't you remember how to hit like you did last season? Where did that guy go? Also, while you're at it, could you teach the rest of the guys something we all learned in Little League called protecting the plate with two strikes??? I may not be a ballplayer, Jimmy, but I do know one thing: it's statistically impossible to get a hit if you don't swing the bat. "

John Salley, co-host of Best Damn, was exactly right. "That's called family." Philly fans are the most loyal--spending time, money, energy, and a lot of tears following our beloved teams. When an entire lineup shuts down production, it is so natural to say, "Hey, we show up. We do our jobs as fans--loving, supporting, rooting unconditionally. Time to do your job. Time to show up." Philly fans don't leave early, they stay and let you have it, if you deserve it. Anyone remember that Monday Night Football game a couple of years ago when Seattle was up like 42-0...at halftime? People stayed. And they booed. Cause you know what? That's part of the job of the fan, to let them have it when they deserve it.

On the other hand, Jimmy's frustrated, and who can blame him? He may not have chosen his words so wisely, and he tried to clarify his meaning in his follow-up statement. But he was trying to express something else, something we all forget, all too often.

Jimmy was trying to say, "Hey, we're people too. You think you're frustrated as fans? You can't even imagine how frustrated we are in this dugout, in this locker room. And when you get on our case and boo like crazy and tell us to show up, that doesn't help. All it does is increases the negative energy, something we're trying desperately to shake. Don't kick us when we're down. Try to reach down and help pick us up."

Hey man, we're all in this together.

Ba-phil-ing

How many times have you gone to check a Phils score this season and ended up just shaking your head? How often do you think about the trajectory of this team's season and say, out loud, the following phrase, just like this:

I just. Don't. Get it.

Every time you think you have this team figured out, they go and surprise you. Just when they seemed to be hitting their mid-season stride, they went into a tailspin from the middle of June through the All-Star break. Then they got hot again, but still couldn't beat the Mets and the Marlins, something I figure they'll have to do at some point if they want to win this division. Now--and I can't believe I'm writing this, though some have been saying it for a while now--I have to ask:

Where on earth is the hitting?

Wasn't this team supposed to be an offensive powerhouse that was going to win a whole bunch of 10-8 games? Wasn't the starting pitching supposed to be the question mark?

Say it with me now: I just. Don't. Get it.

This past Thursday and Friday, the hitting machine that was supposed to be our batting order plated zero runs. Zero. Cole Hamels gave up two earned runs in six innings in Thursday's 3-0 loss to Florida. Then Joe Blanton, in his second straight magnificent start, gives up one hit and strikes out seven over seven innings. And we couldn't get him one lousy run.

To be shut out is embarrassing, to be shut out in extra innings is another thing. And to be shut out in extra innings by the Pittsburgh Pirates, well that's just downright shameful. With a lineup like ours, we should win every single game in which the starter gives up 3 or fewer. Probably even 4.

And yet, somehow, we're still in first place. And Jimmy Rollins seems to be finally waking up. His slumber might explain the dropoff in runs--when Jimmy doesn't set the table, there's no one for the big boys to bring home.

The pitchers are doing their job. Here's hoping the hitters remember how to do theirs.

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Other musings: Those who tell you that the preseason record in football (or in any sport) matters is, with all due respect, an idiot. What matters is the sorting out of the depth chart and other individual performances. So I couldn't care less that the Birds lost their preseason opener. The only stats that matter to me: McNabb, 10 for 13, 97 yards, one touchdown.

Did you know that Bud Light, aside from having "superior drinkability" (see last week's post), also "keeps it coming"? What??? I just. Don't. Get it.

The City of Brotherly Losers

100--count 'em--100 seasons. No championship.

I'm not talking about the Chicago Cubs. I'm talking about the city of Philadelphia.

Last night, as my friend Scott and I watched the Phils hang on by their fingernails for a big win, the desperate plea to the gods of sport was uttered again: "Can't we get just one championship? Please???"

Of all of the cities that have all four major professional sports, no city has gone longer without a championship. Forget the Soul; the last one came when the Sixers won the NBA Finals in 1983. That's 25 seasons times four sports. Ouch.

I feel a little of the pain of Cubs fans. But only a little. After all, they won six NBA titles in eight years with some guy named Jordan. Same reason I didn't feel anything for White Sox fans prior to '05. I didn't feel bad for Boston before 2004 cause the Patriots had just won two of the previous three Super Bowls (whether legitimately or not is another question altogether). I do occasionally feel bad for Cleveland fans, but a) they don't have all four sports, and b) it's not my fault they chose to live in Cleveland. That place made me pine for the time I got lost in Scranton.

Sooner or later, if only based on the laws of probability, this has to end. Doesn't it? The curse of Billy Penn isn't real...right? This can't last forever...can it?

Perhaps Mrs. Bucket, from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, has the answer to our Charlie.

Charlie: But I am different. I want it more than any of them.
Mrs. Bucket: Charlie, you'll get your chance. One day things will change.
Charlie: When? When will they change?
Mrs. Bucket: Probably when you least expect it.
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Other Musings: Did you see the play from Saturday night where the Astros tied up the Mets? It was straight out of "Major League." Special thanks to Kimmie Malecka for finding the link. Click here to watch. A sweet play, made sweeter by the fact that it was against the Mets, and made yet sweeter cause it was against Billy Wagner.

Did you know that Bud Light has "superior drinkability"? Pardon my French, but what the hell does that mean? It's more drinkable than other beers? Come on, people, you made up a word! The characters of Mad Men are somewhere smiling. Or crying. Or both.