Monday, August 25, 2008

For Crying Out Loud

Watching the Phils-Dodgers last night, I saw something I've never seen before.

Trailing 2-1 in the bottom of the ninth, Shane Victorino got things started with a single. Eric Bruntlett laid down a beautiful sacrifice bunt to move Victorino to second. (It still amazes me how many of these professional ballplayers can't lay down a bunt to save their lives.) Werth struck out, and Andy Tracy walked in his first Major League at-bat in four years. Two on, two out, Pedro Feliz is at the plate, the difference between losing and staying alive. And what were some of the Phaithful doing in their seats at the Bank?

They were doing the wave. That's right. The wave.

Now there are those who feel that the wave is harmless fun. And I couldn't disagree more. The wave is what you do when you're not interested in the game. When you're bored. Why on earth would you pay good money to sit in a stadium where a professional ballgame is taking place and focus on the other fans? Is there something I'm missing here?

If you feel that the wave contains some kind of karmic, cosmic bond connecting everyone in that stadium, everyone's entitled to have a wrong opinion. But can we all at least agree that the bottom of the ninth in a one-run game in a pennant race at the end of August might not be the best time for a stinking wave???? Honestly, people.

It's like the bleacher bums who keep doing the E-A-G-L-E-S chant at Phillies games. Fine if the Phils are way out of it, as they were most of the 80's and 90's. But so not cool (or Taguchi for that matter) while they are very much in the thick of a tight division battle.

At a Phils-Mets game last fall with my dad, I finally had enough. I stood up, turned around to the "cheap" seats and yelled, "HEY! IT'S BASEBALL SEASON! YOUR TEAM IS RIGHT HERE!!!!" And I was applauded in my section.
So, seriously, with all due respect, cut the crap. No more Eagles chants. No more waves, certainly not in the bottom of the ninth inning. Let's focus on the task at hand, and do our part in all of this by being good phans.
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For your entertainment, a very funny and short Onion article on Jamie Moyer. (Thanks Matt.)

Other musings: Coors Light may have a vent in its cans for a smoother pour. It may have mountains that turn blue to let you know the bottle's cold like those winter gloves from the 80's (does anyone else remember them?). Heck, it may even have actual crags from the Rockies in each and every delivery truck. But that doesn't change the fact that the beer sucks.